Jersey Girl a Recovering Addicts Interview

 

Jersey Girl a Recovering Addicts Interview came about from meeting a wonderful woman online.  Jersey Girl is an active member of the Narcotics Anonymous 12 Step Fellowship and is an example of how “carrying the message of recovery to others.” She makes herself available online and offline to those who desire to change his/her lives.  I was grateful when she consented to be interviewed. 

 

Jersey Girl a Recovering Addicts Interview

ATN: What was your drug of choice?

Jersey Girl: Alcohol (rum, brandy,vodka) and pills of all kinds

ATN: How many attempts at recovery have you had?

Jersey Girl: I entered the rooms of NA in Sept 2002

ATN: What is your longest clean time?

Jersey Girl: 4 years

ATN: You mentioned your affiliation with NA and you certainly express your belief on your fanpage.

Had NA always been a part of your recovery journey.

Jersey Girl: I did learn enough that I new what I had to do but my ignorance and pride got in the way.

I thought I could do it my way once I learned everything and obviously I learned that does not work.

ATN: Have you been in inpatient treatment? If so, Do you think it helps? What did you like and not like about the treatment you received?

Jersey Girl: No I have never been inpatient treatment. I do know people who it has worked for but I personally think its like everything else in this program it will only work if your ready for it to work and you’re ready to surrender.

ATN: Do you have your family support? What are your relationships with your family like now and what was it like when you were active.

Jersey Girl: I have a good relationship with my son, both my daughters are now adults and do not talk to me, they have told me their mom is dead. I will always hope one day that will change now I have grandchildren I might not ever get the chance to meet breaks my heart.

ATN: Briefly share what being active was like at your lowest point.

Jersey Girl: I was suicidal. I didn’t care about anyone or anything anymore. I had a plan and location and day picked out. when the feelings of others you love don’t matter anymore then you are in a very bad spot.

ATN: What was the trigger to your recent relapse.

Jersey Girl: Bad things happening in life and just saying I had enough, its not working anymore. and I had no reason or purpose to wake up every day.

ATN: I have worked in methadone clinics for several years and my clients have had different experiences with NA. Some state they can join NA but cannot celebrate because they are on methadone.

Others have been told they are not welcome.

I see this as a group conscious issue not a fellowship belief because

1) methadone is prescribed by a doctor, 2) there are people in the rooms who are on anti-depressants, anti-anxiety medication etc. 3) what happened to only needing to have a desire?

Jersey Girl: I think I would be ok with them in the rooms but no they cannot celebrate. anti depressions and such is because of a mental disorder that is out of our control. drug use and recovery is in every bit of our control.  My thoughts are there should be no “bandaids” to help fix the situation you created by your own choices, go to rehab, go thru the withdrawl and detox and learn to live clean.

ATN: Share about your fanpage what is your purpose?

Jersey Girl: I wanted to be there for at least one person who thought that no one cared or no one was available to them, I wanted people to know I am a person who had made mistakes but has a big heart and is trying to help people like the ones who have helped me and sometimes its simply just being there and listening.

ATN: The holidays are coming up what suggestion do you have the newcomer, and family members to keep the newcomer safe during holiday activities.

Jersey Girl: Stay active. go to a lot of meetings. This Christmas will be the first one in my life I have ever spent completely alone, no friends no family no kids no grandkids, no one will be around. and its breaks my heart and i’m a little worried but I love to bike and hike so i’m gonna go on a hike and a bike ride and watch football and remember i’m not the only one alone on that day. I will definitely be at a meeting. Christmas I will be with another addict for at least 1 hour.

ATN: Thank you for consenting to do this interview. Do you have any last words for the Addiction Treatment News readers?

Jersey Girl: I think recovery is very hard because you have to admit your faults your mistakes all the hurt and pain you caused others. I think the NA basic text and the Living Clean are great books. The NA Basic Text is the only book I can honestly admit I have read from cover to cover in my entire life. I am thankful for every single person who has helped me along the way. The may never think about it or remember but I will never forget who they are or how they were a help to me. Today I do not want to die, today I do have a purpose to get up everyday, today I love life and I am very happy I am clean and sober and not suicidal. 

Summary

It was a pleasure getting to know Jersey Girl. I commend her efforts to maintain her recovery and help others. Will be keeping her and her family in prayer that they will one day come together. That her grandchildren will one day get to see and hug her.  That her children will have a forgiving heart.  

Our views regarding how Methadone patients are treated in Narcotics Anonymous defer significantly.  Methadone is a prescribed medication and it is recommended that 12 Step Fellowships and/or therapy be  a part of the treatment regimen.  I have attended NA meetings where the group did not have barriers in place for the methadone users.  These men and women were allowed to participate and celebrate like all other members. This has always led me and some of my colleagues to believe that this is a group conscious decision and not the philosophy of the fellowship itself. 

The holidays are upon us and Jersey Girl has given some solid advice on how to stay safe and abstinent these next few months.  

For group support Jersey Girl is the Administrator of a Facebook Support group “One Addict Helping Another.”

 

Suggested Reading:

What Leads People to Drug Addiction and Alcoholism?

Recommended Facebook Fanpages

Addiction Treatment News Facebook Fanpage

One Addict Helps Another Facebook Fanpage

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Lydia Brown

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Lydia Brown

Lydia Brown, MS, MAC, CSAC, CADAC Editor ATN, Home Business Owner Advocate for Alcohol and Substance Abuse Treatment CARF Surveyor

38 thoughts on “Jersey Girl a Recovering Addicts Interview

    • April 23, 2017 at 8:06 pm
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      Hi Keith I will share your kind words with Jersey Girl. Thank you for your comment!

      Reply
  • April 8, 2017 at 10:54 am
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    You know, I’ve never been an addict to harmful substance, other than chocolate, so I can’t really understand any of what a person goes through to get out of it, or even how a person can fall into this. But it’s always heartwarming for me when i hear about somebody who dragged themselves out of it and now is helping others. Thank you for sharing this, Lydia.

    Reply
    • April 8, 2017 at 11:06 pm
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      Xarah it does puzzle most people but the disease of addiction is real regardless of the substance. I learned you can turn something healthy into something toxic if you lose control. Thanks for commenting

      Reply
  • April 3, 2017 at 11:57 pm
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    I am sure this will be an eye-opener for many and I thank you for shedding light on what can be a dark corner!

    Reply
  • April 3, 2017 at 11:45 pm
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    [ Smiles ] All addicts can clean up their act once they have the right support.

    Great article!

    Reply
    • April 8, 2017 at 11:13 pm
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      Renard with the right support and the desire to stop! Thanks for your comment.

      Reply
  • December 13, 2016 at 9:20 pm
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    Shoot my posts r not connecting here
    Take 3.

    Thank,you Jersey girl for sharing. Suffering and relationship issues often go hand in hand with addicts. As I personally have dealt with addicrion4, my personal approach is love, unconditional love. Try to not enable the addiction, but be present without judgement. Be a light and point to hope and healing. It is a sickness and a destructive one. I prayed for many addicts and have seen healing, backsliding and getting up again. The worst cases have deep seated spiritual issues(And I mean spirits….they often torment some folks who opened doors,to this,realm). Anyhow, I enjoyed Jersey Girls sharing and will pray for her.
    Paula recently posted…Affiliate Marketing 101 or 301?My Profile

    Reply
    • December 13, 2016 at 10:29 pm
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      Thank you Paula for your comment and I will let Jersey Girl know you have her in your thoughts.

      Reply
  • December 13, 2016 at 9:13 pm
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    Ok, my first comment disappeared. I admire Jersey girl for sharing her walk and thoughts. She,gives,great advice and reinforces hope for those lost in addiction. Great post Lydia

    Reply
    • December 13, 2016 at 10:30 pm
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      Hey Paula sorry you had difficulty but your comments did come through. Thank you for visiting.

      Reply
  • December 13, 2016 at 9:11 pm
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    Jersey Girl is awesome for sharing. It seems that once a drug addict looses desire or wants,to help another, they r on road to recovery. I think rehab is important as it equips people with tools, mindsets and people who promote healing and hope.

    Reply
    • December 13, 2016 at 10:30 pm
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      Thank you Paula for your efforts to get through to use. Grateful we received your post.

      Reply
  • November 7, 2016 at 4:34 pm
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    Hi Lydia,

    Awesome! I admire Jersey Girl for opening up and telling her story in such real, genuine fashion. It’s in sharing our ups and downs, and all stories in between, that we inspire folks from all walks of life to dissolve obstacles and to keep on moving towards their dreams. Crazy uncomfortable at times but always, always, always worth it. Thank you Lydia and Jersey Girl for sharing with us 🙂

    Ryan

    A Jersey Guy 🙂
    Ryan Biddulph recently posted…10 BS Blogging Limiting Beliefs about Money and How to Murder these Insidious LiesMy Profile

    Reply
    • November 16, 2016 at 6:33 am
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      Thank you Ryan for your visit and comment. I will share your thoughts with Jersey Girl

      Reply
    • November 6, 2016 at 10:55 pm
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      Thank you Joan for commenting I will let Jersey Girl know you found her story inspiring.

      Reply
    • November 3, 2016 at 11:42 pm
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      Hello Alene, thank you for your comment. I will tell Jersey Girl

      Reply
  • November 2, 2016 at 9:10 pm
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    A very heartfelt and touching interview with Jersey Girl! Having never been close to anyone who has had an addiction, it is hard to fully understand how it can impact their lives and their relationships. It’s wonderful that you are shedding light and hopefully understanding. My hope for Jersey Girl is that her daughters accept her again and she is able to mend and heal the relationships that have been broken and that she finds some peace, especially with family.
    Beverley Golden recently posted…Health is Truly a Matter of Choice(s)My Profile

    Reply
    • November 3, 2016 at 4:49 am
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      Hi Beverly, thank you for your comment. I will definitely share your regards with Jersey Girl.

      Reply
    • November 2, 2016 at 8:46 pm
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      Hi Tamuria, thank you for your comment and support. I will give Jersey Girl your well wishes!

      Reply
    • November 2, 2016 at 5:58 pm
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      Hi Susan, I will definitely send Jersey Girl your regards. Thank you for your comment and stopping by.

      Reply
  • November 2, 2016 at 7:25 am
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    Wow. This article is powerful. As someone win addiction in our family, I feel for her. I can’t imagine my life without my kids. Good for her for staying focused and determined!
    TAndy recently posted…November AffirmationsMy Profile

    Reply
    • November 2, 2016 at 3:03 pm
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      Hello Tandy, Thank you for your comment. It is hard to imagine my life without my children and grandchildren.

      Reply
  • October 31, 2016 at 3:09 pm
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    Hi Lydia,

    This post had me all choked up. I have family members I cannot be with because of their addiction and how it effects me… and them. As the holidays come upon us, it is the most difficult thing to tell them NO. I was an enabler and went through many years of therapy to change that. I know if my brother comes over, I may give in and give him money. I don’t want him to die on my watch. Making boundaries for addicts is the hardest thing of all.

    I am so glad Jersey Girl shares her feelings. When it comes to methidone, it is just like an anti depressant or anti anxiety medication. It can be prescribed and used properly or abused. I feel so bad that NA doesn’t respect that.

    This girl is trying!

    -Donna
    Donna Merrill recently posted…36 Loyal Readers of Donna Merrill TribeMy Profile

    Reply
    • November 2, 2016 at 3:33 am
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      Hi Donna, Jersey Girl’s story got to me two. Having worked in this field for over 20 years I praying for the best for the family members but I know all too well that sometimes it is too late and family for safety chooses to maintain their distance. The best the addict can do is to make amends by living a better life and helping others.

      Reply
  • October 30, 2016 at 11:01 pm
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    This is such an insightful interview. I hope that through your wonderful work people will be able to see the true face of addiction.

    Reply
    • October 30, 2016 at 11:25 pm
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      Thank you Dr. Elise, I truly hope that my blog can help some folk.

      Reply
  • October 30, 2016 at 5:41 pm
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    I can’t believe how very sad this made me, towards the beginning.

    Since I personally have never dealt with an addiction like this, it was really an eye-opener. I have seen so many movies about it, but her words are the reality of it. I can’t imagine how hopeless and helpless it makes a person feel. It strips them of all humanity and dignity.

    I so appreciate her willingness to put it all out there so that we can see into her experience and learn from it.

    Thank you, Lydia, for all that you do to reach the masses and spread the good news about recovery.

    Deborah
    Deborah A. Ten Brink recently posted…10 Ways To Tap Your Creativity [video]My Profile

    Reply
    • October 30, 2016 at 8:06 pm
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      Thank you Deborah, I too appreciate Jersey Girl’s willingness to open up and be honest for ATN.

      Reply
  • October 30, 2016 at 10:32 am
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    Hi Lydia,
    What a deep and eye opening interview this was for me to read.
    I truly hope that Jersey Girl does not have to spend too many more months alone and that her daughters can forgive her choices and see how hard she is trying and how much she is hurting by not being able to see her grandchildren. A life sentence of loneliness when she is taking action and helping others is so cruel.
    Please pass on a massive ‘hug’ to her from me.

    Reply
    • October 30, 2016 at 8:09 pm
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      Hi Sonia, I too pray that Jersey Girls’ children change their mind. I don’t fault them because
      our children have their own story but it would be a shame that the grandchildren don’t get to know
      their grandma as she is today.

      Reply
  • October 30, 2016 at 1:28 am
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    Hi Lydia

    Wow! It is sad that Jersey is going through a lot but I do commend her for keeping strong and I pray that she will be able to reunite with her family and they will be together.

    Thank you Lydia for sharing this interview and making a difference in this world by giving us an insight into the life of addicts and how we can support them. Thanks for sharing. Take care
    ikechi recently posted…Comment on Why The Road Less Travelled is Your Ticket to Bliss by Ikechi AwazieMy Profile

    Reply
    • October 30, 2016 at 1:59 am
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      Thank you Ikechi for visiting and commenting. I will pass on your well wishes to Jersey Girl.

      Reply

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