Foot Prints in the Sand the Beginning of a Spiritual Journey is the true story of one woman’s spiritual awakening when she made the decision to get help.
Late one Sunday night
It was late at night and I had been gone from home for days. Exactly how long I did not know, but I was scared. Introduced to AA a few months ago as I sat on a curb the faces of people in the Sunday night meeting flashed in my mind. Wishing I was with them I felt nothing but loss and sorrow. In my right hand was cocaine in my left was alcohol. “What the hell am I going to do”, I thought as tears ran from my eyes down my cheeks.
An hour earlier I had come to my senses having been in a blackout. I was in a house with people who looked familiar to me but I couldn’t remember anyone’s name. What scared me is how I remembered these people. Half of the men and women in the room I used to see them in front of the liquor store at 7 am every weekday morning from the window of the bus on my way to work.
A totally clear memory of me watching these people every morning and thinking why would anyone be in front of a liquor store this early in the day. There were actual feelings of sorrow for them. Never did I imagine that on my worst day these people and I would spend a whole weekend together getting high. I quickly left the house and ran a few blocks. This woman had offered me something to eat and I had told her I wasn’t hungry. She said, “you haven’t eaten since Tuesday.” Shocked when she said it was now Sunday.
Now sitting on the curb I knew my family must be worried about me. It wasn’t like me to take off. My drinking had never taken me that far before. Feelings of guilt took over my body. I just knew I needed to get home. With my head hanging down, I heard a voice say, “look up the street.” So I did and I saw a cab. Something strange was happening to me I knew it but didn’t question it. The voice did not come by way of my ears, the words were not a thought in my head. The voice was in my chest where up to now I refer to as the place that hosts my soul.
The Angels must have hold of me
I stood up and threw the alcohol and drugs down the drain and began running towards the cab. The light from the cab was brilliant I could see it as if it were only half a block away. As I ran I thought I don’t have money for this. The voice told me, “don’t worry keep going, it will be ok.” When I got to the cab I realized I had run three blocks. On my best day my vision was not that good. My twenty/twenty vision I know would not allow me to see a cab three blocks away. Relieved I jumped into the cab and told the driver that I didn’t have money but if he could please take me home to my family. I promised him that he would be paid when we got there. Now I had no idea if anyone was home but the voice assured me it would be ok and not to worry. With confidence, I took the half hour ride home. Every minute saying to myself, God I need help.”
Foot Prints in the Sand the Beginning of a Spiritual Journey
Woke up two days later. My family took me to a 28-day program pretty upset with me no one would go in with me. However, they made it clear if I didn’t stay they would not be there for me. Fear gripped me as I went through the door. Since being home I hadn’t heard from the voice and chalked it up to being high.
Walked up to the reception desk when something weird happened. It sucked the breath out of me. Just as I got to the desk my body felt like I was being placed on the ground. I felt a presence leaving me and I turned around and said, “please don’t go.” At that point, I felt a warm sensation on my left hand. It felt like someone was holding it. With a sense of peace, I turned back to the receptionist who looked at me strangely and I didn’t care. All I knew was that I was in the right place. I explained why I was there. A few minutes later a man came to take me to another floor. When we got to the doors of an elevator I felt the hold on my hand easing up but the warmth was still there.
When we got to the floor of the program I saw in a frame “Foot Prints in the Sand.” Having never read or heard of it before I smiled because I knew that was my story. God had rescued me and stayed with me.
Later in the day, I realized that the warmth I had felt on my hand was now in my chest where the voice used to be. Twenty-one years later that warmth is still there. Not as strong but still there. The closest thing I can equate to what is going on is when you hear people talk about being born again.
Whenever I am about to do something wrong or say something wrong that place in my chest would give off a signal like a movement. For a long time, I would heed the warning and redirect myself. As the years have gone by the warmth is not as strong as it used to be. I think with each wrong decision I have made in life on my recovery journey the warmth dimmed.
At first, that bothered me but I have learned that I am not perfect. That is probably why the warmth is still in my chest. Also, the fact that I care about myself and others I don’t get as many warnings because I check myself. My life in recovery has been amazing. I have no regrets my experience has made me more grateful for what I have than I ever was before becoming an alcoholic and user of drugs.
All I can say is, “God is Good All the Time, and All the Time God is Good.”
Last night I had a dream. I dreamed I was walking along the beach with the Lord. Across the sky flashed scenes from my life. For each scene, I noticed two sets of footprints in the sand: one belonged to me, the other to the Lord.
After the last scene of my life flashed before me, I looked back at the footprints in the sand. I noticed that at many times along the path of my life, especially at the very lowest and saddest times, there was only one set of footprints.
This really troubled me, so I asked the Lord about it. “Lord, you said once I decided to follow you, You’d walk with me all the way. But I noticed that during the saddest and most troublesome times of my life, there was only one set of footprints. I don’t understand why, when I needed You the most, You would leave me.”
The Lord replied, “My son, my precious child, I love you and I would never leave you. During your times of suffering, when you could see only one set of footprints, it was then that I carried you.”
**I hope you enjoyed this story as much as I have enjoyed sharing it with you. If so comment below and share your spiritual journey. Don’t forget to share to your favorite social media network.**